The Rainbow Curse
by atomic muffin
Summary: Natsume stumbled upon the less divine-looking God he ever met and his six-and-a-half overzealous protectors. Things did not go smoothly from there, to the surprise of no one. KHR x Natsume Yuujincho Crossover. No pairing
1. Introduction

The Rainbow Curse

Summary : Natsume stumbled upon the less divine-looking God he ever met and his six-and-a-half overzealous protectors. Things did not go smoothly from there, to the surprise of no one. KHR x Natsume Yuujincho Crossover

Disclaimer : Neither Natsume Yuujincho or Katekyo Hitman Reborn are mine, which is too bad but I shall recover through frantic fanficing (yeah. It's a word.) The quote at the beginning isn't mine either, though I've no idea where I took it from.

Rated T

Pairing : None, although I can't stop you from speculating.

AN : English isn't my first langage, and I'm not beta'ed

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Introduction, or how to out-maneuver your very own Youkai pet with minimal side damage

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" _If you can't dazzle them with brillance, blind them with bullshit."_

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"Where did ya said you w're going again?", asked Nyanko-sensei, as he came back from his usual party time with the other Youkai of Yatsuhara, his voice blurry with the gigantic amount of alcohol he had not doubt ingested tonight.

Natsume, busy packing for the new schooltrip he had found himself enlisted in, didn't ever bother raising his head from his closet. "Namimori mountain. And I don't remember saying you were coming, you stupid intoxicated Sensei. You smell awful by the way. Please don't let the Fujiwaras see you."

The highschool student waited for the usual concerto of indignant protestations, starting with "Moron, you ain't gonna survive _one day_ without my divine protection!", nevermind the fact that Natsume did manage to survive fifteen years on his own, thank you very much, followed by "don't be impertinent with me, the great Madara-sama, you foolish human!" movement, ended by, if Natsume was especially lucky and Sensei particularly drunk, the ever classic "Just give me the Book of friends already!".

As if the teenager didn't already knew Nyanko-sensei was only stalking him for Touko-san food's. Well, also for the Book of Friends. But mostly for the food, that shameless free-loader.

That wasn't what happened that night however. No lecture on the utter importance of showing respect to your betters, not even one small insult to his intellect. Which, all in all, was _much, much_ more worrying.

"Ah?", was surprisingly the only anwser he got from the infuriating youkai, who, after a long pause of reflexion probably lenghthened by his advanced drunken state, finally gratifed his 'target' with a simple "bah".

And that was what definitly set Natsume on edge. Because, according to his extensive knowlegde of his so-called bodyguard's vicious streak, this specific kind of "bah" could easily be translated into "I know something you don't 'cause I'm a ancient awesome youkai like that but I'm not telliiiiing to the puny stupid human".

Which would inevitably come biting him in the arse, because whatever Nyanko-sensei was not telling him, Natsume woul get somehow involved with. _Inevitably._ Somehow, there had to be some Universe's completely unfair Law stating that should one Natsume Takashi ever come close to some random Youkai Drama, he shall get find himself intangled in it, without fail.

This time however, Natsume was very keen on avoiding the problem before it even happened, therefore managing one harmless, boring, Youkai-free schooltrip at least once in his life.

That fake ugly cat was so going to spit whatever he was holding on out, _or else_.

"Oh no you don't", Natsume growled with what he hoped sounded like a threating voice, while extracting himself from his closet. "You know something, and you're not gonna stay quiet on this one."

"'I've no idea what you're talking about, Baka-Natsume.", unbelievebly denied Nyanko-sensei, while turning his head in a very obnoxious manner.

Oh _come on_. He couldn't even suppress his condescending smirk, that useless wasted cat. Truly, the only one Sensei could credibly lie to was himself. Unlike Natsume, who was quite skilled himself in the lying-through-your-teeth departement, a talent he was going to have to use _here and now_. For the good cause, obviously.

"Oh, I see", the teenager sighed dramatically. "If you want to play it like that, I don't have many choices, do I?"

Immediatly, despite his drunkeness, the youkai grew wary of the teen's deceptively light tone.

"What...what are you rambling about, Natsume?", inquired Sensi, eyes narrowed into a suspicious look, still clinging to his almost empty Sake bottle.

Pray the Lord the Fujiwara's never found about the 'secret' stash of sake Madara kept under a pile of clothes, because he doubted he could convice them it was the cat's, no matter his first-hand experience in justifying unlikely events.

"Well, if Sensei is being uncooperative, I'll have to do something drastic, unfortunatly. Have you ever heard of the world _diet_ before?"

The Nyanko's eyes turned incredibly round, and it felt positively glorious to Natsume. "You _wouldn't_."

"I so would", contradicted Reiko's grandson with a huge smile. "How long do you think it would take me to convince Tokou-san that, _for your own sake_ , a change of diet is in order. We wouldn't want you to die of a precocious heart attack with your incredibly high cholesterol, right?"

He probably wouldn't actually, if only not to lie to his surrogate mother more than he already had to. Besides, she would certainly worry over 'Nyankichi-kun's' health, no matter how pointless it was. But Sensei wouldn't think of that, would he?

"I'm not _fat_!", screamed hysterically the youkai, pointing accusingly his 'student' with what a was supposed to be a threatening paw. His current appearance completely ruined the effect though. "My real form is magnificent, and glorious, and more _physically fit_ than your scrawny pathetic human carcass could ever hoped to be!"

Too true, although Natsume would rather choke than admit it to his face. His Sensei was insufferable enough without being actively encouraged.

"Well, the Fujiwara's can't know that, right?", argued the sandy-haired teen, with a thoughful look.

"Are you seriously trying to blackmail me, Natsume?"

 _Definitly_.

"That's just mean, Sensei, when I'm only trying to look after you". Natsume didn't push the drama to actually pout, but the feeling was here nonetheless. The things he had to do, honestly. "Well, I guess I'll have to inform Touko-san of our new _arrangements_ now..."

"Wait a minute!" _Bingo_. "Fine, fine, I'll tell you!"

Natsume just seat himself confortably, waiting for the youkai to stop sulking while erasing any trace of his inner smugness.

"Really, what would your friends say if they knew what a _sadistic_ you truly are?", grumbled Nyanko-sensei.

Natsume refrained the urge to roll his eyes at bodyguard's antics, simply raising a inquisite eyebrow, a efficient move he had learned from Hinoe, though he was yet to be as proficient than she was.

"I don't know that much anyway. Rumors mostly."

"I'll take my chances.", Natsume smiled softly. "please enlight the poor ignorant human I am with your infinite knowdegde, Sensei."

"Drop the meaningless flattery, you're a thousand years early to ever think to fool me." Nyanko frowned, before eventually complying. "Have you heard of the Rainbow Curse, per chance?"

If the Youkai World had a Power Ranger Brigade, Natsume was _so_ out of here, mandatory school trip or not. Or maybe it was some kind of Gay Pride?

"I cannot say I have, though it doesn't sound that terrible."

"Don't let yourself be fooled by the name.", Nyanko-sensei snorted. "From what I've gathered, a while ago, a god and seven powerful Youkai fell prey to an overwheming Curse, one that's still currently operative. Legends said the Curse is necessary for the balance of the Spiritual World, or something. Regardless of the reasons behind it, the Youkai had their power partially sealed, et condamned to be stuck into a shameful form."

"A shameful form? Like yours, Sensei?", despite the serious of the conversation, Natsume couldn't quite help himself from teasing his reluctant friend.

"Fool, whatever form I take are magnificent, remember that!", Nyako-sensi roared, or more accurently hissed. Cats were't made for roaring after all, whatever their 'real mind-blowing form' actually was.

"Hai, hai, absolutly", dismissed the teen with an soothing smile. "So, what kind of shape are we talking about? A worm? A rock?"

Natsume couldn't think of a more boring form to be stuck in than one of a rock.

"Worse", the cat shivered for emphasis at the thought, effectivelly channeling the inner Drama Queen his human friend always knew he had deep down. "Human children."

Ah. Well, Takashi couldn't conceive how being a human child was worse than a rock, but he hardly was an Youkai older than dirt, therefore probably lacking the proper minset. That, or Sensei was just that mad. Let's not go down that road, though.

"I see... I suppose they live in Namimori Mountain then?", Natsume ventured a guess.

"Nope, at least not that I know of. The God does though, if my info are still correct, that's it."

"Had he turned into a infant too?", asked Takashi, thinking of his friend Kai. It had been a long since he last saw the Mountain God. Perhaps he ought to visit him someday.

"Of course not", snorted Nyanko-sensei, sending a condescending glare to his student. "A curse wouldn't have the same effect on a God and Youkais, no matter how powerful they were in the first place."

Right. Because Gods can't do things like everyone else. "What happened to him then?"

"No idea. I've heard the story from on of the Cursed, and he was pretty secretive on the subject. You should ask Hinoe, she might know something. I swear that woman _lives_ to gossip."

Pot and kettle, sensei. Pot and kettle.

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"Namimori Mountain?", repeted Hinoe after taking a draft from her long pipe. "Why the sudden interest?"

Taking Nyanko-sensei's advice to heart for once, Natsume had managed to corner her alone while the others were busying themselves partying, drinking themselves into oblivion and making a general embrassement of themselves. Natsume wouldn't have it any other way, if only for blackmailing material it provided, or so he told himself. He chukled quietly as Sensei began to argue over the vertue of some sake over another while gesturing wildly, his sake bottle still in his paws. Hinoe sent him a pointed glare, and the teen started recounting her his current 'situation'.

"Oh, it's one of those human things", noded the Youkai with an understanding sigh. "Well, I don't know much of the God either, actually, but he's not the one you should be worried about, I think."

"How so?", prayed the highscool student, completely attentive now. So there _was_ something he should be worry about. _Of course_ there was.

"The Namimori Mountain God is protected by six attendants. Well, seven. More like six-and-a-half I guess.", Hinoe answered, grinning as her young human friend grew more confused than before by her explanations. "They are very strong, and can be...overzealous when it comes to their master's safety. But, well, it's a huge mountain. I'm sure you can managed to avoid a few youkais for what, six days?"

Oh yeah, because that went _so well_ before. This was going to turn into a disaster. Natsume could tell.

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"This is gonna be so _awesome_!" cheered Nijimura as he affectionly locked Nastume's neck with one arm from behind, and pumped his free fist through the air.

Takashi was absolutly convinced that one day, if Youkai didn't manage it before, Nichimura's sheer enthusthiasm would kill him. Worst of all, the sandy-haired teen probably wouldn't even mind. He was just that pathetically thirsty for genuine friendship.

"Nichimura!" howled Sasada with indignation, fortunatly not meant for Takashi's himself. Not that he would admit it anytime time soon, but the class representative could be.. _intense_. Which was a understatement for borderline scary if one was feeling like being honest, but Natsume was perfectly fine with staying in Denial territory, thank-you-very-much. " You're choking Natsume-kun you idiot!"

"You can't choke someone with a one arm-hug, Rep", loudly protested said idiot, thankfully releasing his victim from his friendly but tight embrace.

The two of them began to argue as they usually did, while Kitamoto laughed at their antics in the background.

"Well, it's certainly lively here", a familiar deep male voice noted with amused tone.

"Tanuma, Taki!", exclaimed Natsume as he finally noticed his friends' arrival. "What are you doing here?"

The question wasn't without value. Neither of them were part of the trip, since only Natsume's class would be going to Namimori Montain, therefore had no reason to be on schoolground a Sunday morning.

"We came to see you off, Natsume-kun", softly answered Taki, adressing him a enthusiastic smile that failed to completely hid the concern in her eyes. She, along with Tanuma, was probably worried he would find himself into some endangering Youkai problem, not without reason.

What a terrible friend he made, making them feel bad about him all the time.

"Taki-san came to wish me goodbye!", swooned Nichimura in a impressive demonstration of selective deafness and complete denial. "I feel so happy!"

Kitamoto had definitly given up on keeping the bit of retenue he had left and was all but rolling on floor with laugher. Lucky man.

"They came for Natsume-kun, idiot!", roared Sasada, as she gratified the infutuated teen of a smack behind the head, with the tiny hope it might get him back to Earth. Because, deep down, the class representative was such an _optimist_.

Tanuma laughed heartfully at their antics, Taki chuckled quietly behind her hand, and Natsume resisted the urge to smile from ear to ear, in a futile attempt to stop his heart from combusting from sheer happiness.

"Is Ponta coming with you?", inquired Tanuma in a low voice, and Taki suddently perked up with stars in her eyes. How could she find the fat pig-cat _cute_ , Nastume had no idea for the life of him.

"Since I didn't see Sensei this morning, and that my bag is _much ,much_ heavier today than yesterday, I dare say he is." the sandy-haired teen shruggled with a sheepish smile, as his bag began to move on his back, probably in protestation for the weight comment. "I'll be just fine, don't worry. It's only for a week, right?"

Tanuma smiled back weakly, likely pondering in his head all the things that could happened to Natsume in such a _long_ lapse of time, whereas Taki simply rose an eyebrow in septicism. She had long given up on the "what could possibly go wrong" school of thought, especially when one Natsume Danger-really-is-my-middle-name Takashi was concerned.

The two of them kept their worry to themselves however, for there was little they could actually do anyway, and waved goddbye to their friends as Kitamoto dragged a sheepish Natsume to the bus waiting for them.

Everything would be just fine. Right.

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"Two days."

"Is that a bet, Taki? I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to bet on your friend's well being. What are the stakes?"

"Bragging rights?"

"One day. I doubt Nastume could stay out of trouble more than twenty-four hours on known Youkai territory."

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Read and Review?


	2. Act one

The Rainbow Curse

Summary : Natsume stumbled upon the less divine-looking God he ever met and his six-and-a-half overzealous protectors. Things did not go smoothly from there, to the surprise of no one. KHR x Natsume Yuujincho Crossover

Disclaimer : Neither Natsume Yuujincho or Katekyo Hitman Reborn are mine, which is too bad but I shall recover through frantic fanficing (yeah. It's a word.)

Rated T

Pairing : Alright, I said no pairing, but a slight Hana/Ryohei might have wrote itself. it's really minor though, blink and you won't see it.

AN : English isn't my first langage, and I'm not beta'ed. I'm sure there is plenty of horrible mistakes I didn't see and apologize in advance

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Act 1, or how to get EXTREMELY enlisted against your will in the only interspecies Fight Club ever

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" _I swear I'm not seeking for trouble. It's trouble that keeps on throwing itself on my way_."

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Despite his friends' shameless speculations, Natsume had managed to reach Namimori without inducing youkai cataclysm of any sort, a fact he couldn't help but feel deeply proud of. The trip had been delighfully uneventful, with Sensei keeping quiet for the four-hours-with-a-30-minutes-break ride against all expectations, and the whole class had reached their inn late afternoon.

From then, their teacher (the real human Sensei, not the feline one playing dead in his bag) had given his student free time to settle into their room until dinner at seven-something.

And now Natsume was left to ponder over his options regarding his Nyanko-Sensei-Managing Isssue. He couldn't possible leave his sort-of-friend in the bag for the whole week, neither could he keep him with him since pets weren't allowed. Natsume was reluctantly good at deception, but hardly talented enough to hide the fat loud cat into the bedroom he shared with Nichimura and Kitamoto without theem noticing. His better option lied on simply releasing Sensei into the 'wilderness' for the time being, hoping he would stay out of trouble, which according to the teen's previous experience on the matter was very unlikely...not that himself had a lot of room to talk about.

Besides, Takashi was pretty sure Nyanko-Sensei had grown used to human confort, and therefore would hardly be thrilled about the arrrangement. He probably would come back within two days to Natsume's current place, completely wasted and reeking of alcohol, effectively blowing their 'cover' to his temporary roommates.

However, turned out Natsume didn't have to make a decision as Kitamoto decided to take the matter in his own hands not two minutes after the three boys had claimed for their own a yellow-painted room on ground floor.

"Natsume," suddently anounced Kitamoto, unusually dead serious. "I'm pretty sure I saw your bag move. _Twice_."

The sandy-haired student froze on the spot, his hands still inside the _other_ bag with his real stuff he had brought, stunned by his friend's observation.

What. To. Do?

"Moving bag, ha!" laughed Nichimura, oblivious to his friend's dilemna. "What kind of kinky stuff did you take with ya, Natsume? Or did you hid that pig-cat of yours into it?"

The teen's eyes widened involontary at the joke, which pretty much gave him away, as if he wasn't screwed enough already. Thanks the Lord Kitamoto had waited for them to be alone before bringing up the subject. For instance, Nastume could certainly do without Sasada on his case. More than usually, that's it.

"You _really_ did brought your pet," sighed Kitamono, putting his hand against his forehead with an expression of fond resignation as his gleeful best friend made a move to litteraly let the cat out the bag.

Which is oblivously the moment Nyanko-sensei chose to make the grand entrance he'd been waiting for, letting the inner drama queen he kept on denying the existance of express itself.

Nichimura fell back on his rolled futon with a loud yelp as the white and orange furryball suddently jumped out of his 'cage' and landed on his human's lap, sending the surprised teen an arrognant smirk.

"I didn't brought him actually," denied Natsume with a sheepish smile, while he began to pet the smug youkai almost on reflex. "He brought himself."

Nichimura sent an hostile glare at the purring smug feline for the gratious scare the beast gave him, and Nyanko-Sensei answered with a provocative mewing. Nastume gave his bodyguard a small pinch for his childishness as Kitamoto rolled his eyes at their antics and smirked at the cat's 'master'.

"I can't tell if he's your cat or you're his human" and wasn't that the story of Natsume's life lately.

"Probably the later," he shruggled as the Youkai on his lap adressed Kitamoto a look of approval, clearly assessing the taller brunet as the brains of the duo. "I'm really sorry for the problem I'm causing though, guys."

"It's only a problem if you get caught. Though who would have thougth you were such a thug? Going a against the rules and all that." Kitamoto reassured him a sly grin. "By the way, Nichimura, you'd best get on Natsume's cat good side. I heard from Tanuma Taki is extremly fond of him."

"Taki-san? No way!" the smaller boy cried out in fake dramatic despair.

"Don't worry about it, Nichimura. Just get him something food-related, and Nyanko-sensei would ditch me in a heartbeat."

The Youkai mimicked biting Natsume's hand for the jarb at his expense, and the human chukled without bothering to take back his appendage.

"What are gonna do though with the cat?" inquiered Nichimura, not without reason. "I doubted Sensei is going to be thrilled with your additional charge."

"I don't really know," Natsume sighed, before he smiled at the purr the content youkai on his lap let out at his ministrations. "I thought letting him sleep with me and let him out him in the day."

"You might do that quickly," casually dropped Kitamoto. "I think Sensei has started her round."

Natsume blamed at the warning, inconscienciously squeeezing his 'pet' against his chest in frantic realisation. Their teacher might conduct a real and proprer inspection of their room, which he might not get away with hidding the fat cat into a closet or something.

"Oh damn!" cursed Natsume as he rose up suddently in panic, holding a displeased Madara into his arms.

Ignoring Kitamoto's amused chuckles, he promptly opened the window and hushed Sensei through it.

"Come on, Sensei," the teen whispered to the cat, who kept on sending him nasty glares. "Come back in an hour or so. If not, I'll go hunting you."

Nyanko-sensei snorted at the 'threat', but finally took off. Natsume could only hope the ancien ayakashi would keep his word not to draw attention to himself.

Without conviction however.

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All in all, Natsume considered he could safely say that, in his rather short life full of unwanted adventures, he had seen plenty of weird _things,_ especially Youkai-related weird _things_.

Youkais dancing, laughing, drinking, chasing him, trying to eat him, trying to enslave him, however, for the life of him, Natsume could swear he never actually saw a Youkai _training_. Youkais running to save their skin, yes. Youkais chasing after their prey, usually Natsume himself, yes. But Youkai doing mundane physical sports training like _stretching_ , or _jogging_ , or _throwing punches_ in the air, while screaming sporadic shouts of "EXTREME!"...Now that was a first.

Natsume would have bet the guy was human, if only for the white piece of white cloth covering the upper part of his face and the complete indifference to the rather loud spectacle of the other humans passing _right next to him_.

Reiko's grandson had no idea how long he stood there, gaping stupidly, frozen in morbid fascination.

" _Sensei_..." he finally managed to croak, without looking at the smaller Youkai standing next to him.

"Don't ask me," answered Nyanko-sensei, seemingly in the middle of a life crisis. "I just don't know. I tried to pinch myself _but it wouldn't_ _go away_."

The two of them stayed quiet for what felt hours, watching from the edge of the woods where Natsume had found his furry friend, stunned by incredulity as the weird youkai clad into the ugliest hakama _ever_ started enthusiastic push-ups. In retrospect, Takashi really should have stayed at the inn, where things still made minimal sense, instead of chasing after Madara as usual when he still hadn't show up two hours after the deadline Natsume had set.

"I didn't even knew those kinds of color existed," Natsume admited with horrified wonder. "I can't even tell what's worse : the radioactive canary yellow or the neon bright highway cone-like orange."

How could one person managed to be such a noise _and_ visual pollution, it was a marvel of the most terrific kind.

"Those are not colors," nodded along his smaller compagnion. "Those are _weapons_. I bet it's an human creation. No youkai would have imaginated something _that hideous_."

Perhaps it was that, the Rainbow Curse, a severe color blindness and a minor cognitive disorder. He would never have thought so, but after careful consideration, maybe the Power Ranger Theorie would have been preferable.

"Oh, I don't know," disagreed quietly Natsume. "Feels pretty surnatural to me. I think it's actually digging holes in my retina."

"I assure you, you get used to it after a while." an unfamiliar female voice announced, amused.

Natsume jumped in surprise and abruptly turned to face a pretty dark-haired woman standing a few feet away from Nyanko-sansei and himself. Had he been so completely distracted by the odd youkai he had not heard at all the intruder coming? Reiko's grandson had always relied on his wary senses, for it had saved his life more than once. For her to go undetected by his vigilance no matter how distracted he was, she had to be rather powerful. Takashi eyed her suspiciously, pondering over the necessity to make a quick retreat or not. The unknown youkai looked harmless enough, though Nastume had seen too much to let himself be fooled by her deceptively well-put young apparence.

Nyako-sensei however didn't seemed alarmed by her presence algother, so Natsume assumed it was safe enough. For now.

"Not need to be so suspicious, little human," the ayakashi smirked in faint amusement, her moss green practical kimono rustleling as she drew closer to the pair. " I'm not going to _eat_ you."

Nastume involontary shivered at the motion of eating and himself in the same sentence from a member of a species known for having a fondness for human flesh. Brought back many unnecessary memories.

"Sure you're not," agreed his bodyguard before the human could find a proper answer to the bold statement, his tone laced with underlying threat. " Nobody touch my prey but me."

Apparently more exasperated than frightened by the cat's menacing innuendo, the black-haired woman rolled her eyes, or so Natsume assumed she did. A huge purple flower sliped on her wavy tresses fell on the right upper part of her face, effectively hiding her right eye from sight. People sure had a weird fashion sense here, even for the youkai world's rather lax standarts.

"Possessive, aren't we, Madara-san? How unbecoming", commented the female ayakashi, her voice laconic as she was exchanging banalities, which, in a twisted kind of way, she was.

The nyanko's eyes narrowed with suspicion, and Natsume began to plan for a smooth escape. Fortunatly, as far the sandy-haired teen could see, the other weird youkai had yet to notice the gathering, as he was still in the middle of his push-up series. On a single hand. While shouting "EXTREME" each time he brushed the ground. What. The. Actual. Hell. Clearly, Takashi, despite his extensive unwanted knowledge of Every Youkai-Related Matters had not been ready for the madness that apparently was Namimori Mountain. He so hoped the spiky white-haired oddity was more of an exception than the rule, but somehow he seriously doubted it.

"I don't think we've met." spated back Nyanko-Sensei, his posture as regal as his ridiculous current form allowed after he had jumped on Natsume over-used shoulder.

If their interlocutor was even a tidy bit impressed, she let none of it showed, perfectly maintaining her blasé attitude as she reached out for a familiar looking long pipe sliped into her obi.

"Your reputation precedes you. Natusme Takashi," the dark-haired youkai pointed at him with her black-glossed pipe, and then redirected it at the fat cat scowling at her from his organic perch. "And his side-kick the legendary Madara."

The highschool student froze on the spot, ignoring Sensei's revolted protestations of "who's the side-kick, witch?". That was bad. Usually, youkais he hadn't met before recognised him Natsume _Reiko_ , not as himself. Did that meant he had managed to make such a reputation for himself without noticing?

 _Unless_...

"We've never met but you do seem familiar," Nastume spoke for the first at the female ayakashi, who was obviously amusing herself a lot at their expense. "Are you an acquaintance of Hinoe, per chance?"

Two fine dark eyebrows perked up, and the teen could have bet he saw a glint of admiration briefly pass in those sharp dark grey eyes of hers.

"Observant, for an human monkey," conceded the youkai with a small nod of ackowledgement. "I'm Hana. Hinoe is my sister. She sent me a message to warn me of your...imminent visit. What gave me away by the way?"

"Your behavior, I guess," the young human shruggled, relaxing at the admission. "And the pipe, Hinoe has the exact same. A lucky guess, mostly."

Hana humed thoughfuly, caressing the still unused instrument with a barely concealed affectionate look.

"Why didn't you just said so in the first place?" grumbled Sensi, probably still sore for the 'side-kick' comment. Natsume rather liked the idea though. "Are you one those God's attendants then?"

Hinoe's mischievous sister let out a short laugh at the question, as she casually leant back against a tree, her pipe dancing beetween her fingers. "Attendant? You mean a Guardian I suppose? If so, then no, I'm not, though you've just spent at least twenty minutes staring at one."

At her unexpected remark, human and youkai shared a confused look, before adverting their eyes towards the field where the weirdo had started punching an innocent _scarecrow_. At least Natsume presumed of his innocence. In the spiritual world, you'd never know what kind of non-sense they could pull off their hat.

"Him?" they both exclaimed, incredulous, with a surprising coordination, pointing said youkai with a finger and a paw respectively. "No way!"

"Why ever not?" chuckled the female ayakashi, making the petals of the flower on her head wave gently. "He's an odd monkey, I'll give you that, they all are. Bat shit crazy actually. But strong, loyal and devoted to our Lord, in their own way. What to ask more?"

Natsume could almost see the gears turning madly inside his bodyguard's colorful head. Madara was _speculating_ and the Book of friends' current owner positively _hated_ when his teacher did that, for it often brought cataclysmic adventures no one had asked for.

"The Nameless God," brought up Sensei with fake casualness, and Natsume had to resist the urge to repetively bang his head against a tree trunk, because seriously, couldn't the idiot be even more _oblivious_? "You know of him then?"

Hana suddently rose up, her reserved but algother friendly behavior turning frosted icy lightening fast.

Huge social faux pas then. Good jod, Sensei, _amazing_ even.

"Look, since you two are sort-of friends of my sister, I shall warn you," she frowed at them, crossing her arms against her chest defensively. "Don't ask question about _him_. Ever. People here don't like having strangers poking their nose into our affairs."

Luckily, Nastume was very set on staying out of nose-poking of any sort. If anything, it was youkai buisness that kept on throwing itself at his face. And if he had to keep Nyanko-sensei on a leash to stop him from annoying the grown-ups, he so _would_.

"Ah, I'm so sorry," the sandy-haired teen bowed while grabing his idiotic bodyguard from his shoulder and holding him into his arms, his hand fermly locked on Sensei's mouth. "I assure you we meant no offense. I'm here only for human reasons, and have no intition on causing problem, _and neither does Madara_." he added with a small pinch to the cat's thick fur.

Nyanko-sensei, fidgeting into the skinny human's arms, sent him a rather mean glare, obviously not thrilled with the public repimand. Nastume couldn't have care less, discretly sighting in relief when Hana nodded in approval and returned to a more relaxed stance.

"Well then, we'll take our leave now," Takashi smiled politely. "Thanks for the greeting, Hana-san, it was a really treat meeting you."

"What, leaving so soon?" she grinned back with a familiar sly glint that definitly put the boy on edge. "Since you're so curious, I just can't let you go without introducing you two to Ryohei. Oi, airhead monkey!", she suddently called out loudly, effectively attracting the odd youkai attention Natsume decidly wanted to do without. "Come here for a sec, would you?"

Both human and youkai froze up, and exchanged looks of mutual panic as the so-called Ryohei waved back at the traitorous wicked ayakashi. _Not good, not good at all_...

"Ah, I'm afraid we really must go now!" Natsume made a last desesperate attempt to weasel his way out, but Hana caught the loose end of his tee-shirt with her slender fingers and gratified the teen with a typical Hinoe-like deadpan glare. "People are going to start looking for me." Too true. It was almost seven already, and his rommates couldn't cover for him forever.

"It won't take long," argued back Hinoe's sister, with a small grin Nastume translated 'you're ten thousands years too young to even think fool me, _moron_ ', which was most likely true. "He's already here anyway."

At that, Natsume made the mistake to turn his head to the direction she pointed out with her thumb, and therefore got a whole eyeful of the newcomer, so close he could identify the marking on the Guardian's white paper hidding his eyes as the kanji for Sun. Until the sheer proximity with bright orange and yellow temporarily blinded him, that's it.

His poor eyes were _so not_ ready for this shit.

"Hana!" the colorful youkai loudly greeted black-haired ayakashi with the same enthusiasm he seemingly put into everything he did while Natsume slowly recovered from the psychedelic experience. "You're looking extremely beautiful today!"

At the frank compliment, the brunette turned her head on the side, obviously trying to hide her growing blush, with mixed results. Natsume silently cheered the obnoxious fighter, thanking whatever deity was watching over him (and probably having a good laugh at his expense) for the unusually fair retribution of Embarrasement Karma.

"Don't be a flirt," she grumbled without her trademark cutting bark. "Anyway, I've got people to present you to."

The 'Sun Guardian' turned his attention towards the two strangers, who responded with a hesitant smile from the teen and a glare from the ugly fat cat finally released from the human's evil clutches.

"Are those friends of yours, Hana?" the white-haired youkai nodded with vigor at them without waiting her answer. "Name's Ryohei, Extreme Sun Guardian!"

Natsume nodded back, still wary, fervently hoping that Nyanko-sensei wouldn't try praying for answers they really could do without.

"Of my sister, actually," answered laconically the femalle ayakashi, before taking upon herself to make the presentations "The cat is Madara and the human Natsume Takashi."

"Human?" repeted her compagnon, his mouth going round with surprise. Natsume prepared himself for the usual wariness youkai displayed when they learned of his dreadful 'condition'. He should have know better however, for Ryohei kept on defying all expectations. " How EXTREME!"

At the sudden outburst, Nyanko gave Natsume the kind of caustic smirk usually preceding merciless teasing. "Heard that, Baka-Natsume? You're _extreme_! Ain't ya glad?"

Natsume answered in kind. "Delighted. Don't be jealous, Sensei. On that, pleasure meeting all, but we _really_ must go now..."

Unfortunaltly, Ryohei didn't seemed to have heard him, lost in his thoughts and Hana apparently didn't felt inclined to intervene for the time being.

"Natsume..." the fighter mused out loud. "I'm so sure I heard that name before!"

Hane rose an elegant eyebrow, once again displaying an amazing control of her facial features, as her compagnion started to grip several strands of his spiky hair in frustration, before she saw fit to relieve him from his torments.

"Natsume Reiko. She's the one you must have heard of, and this Natsume here is her grandson," she graciously clarified for her more intellectually-challenged friend.

Natsume felt more than he saw Nyanko-sensei froze at his side, likely preparing himself for a potential fight when the matter of the Book of Friends was finally brought up. Which, oddly enough, did _not_ happen for once in Natsume's life. He had seriously started to think everything resolved around that damn book nowadays.

"Oooh, I remember now!" proudly brightened the male youkai. "That super strong human chick, right? Are you strong too, Natsume?"

More than used to the Sun Guardian's exuberance, Hana simply rolled her eyes and smirked as a speechless Natsume only managed to managed to answer a pathetic "ugh" at the bold question. She had spent so much time around Ryohei she sometime forgot how his attitude could confuse the hell out of people.

She definitly should released Royhei on clueless innocent bystanders more often. That was _fun_.

And truly, it was all inner fun and giggles for her until the dumbass monkey suddently made a move towards Natsume, probably to grip his shoulders and try covey his manly love of fighting or whatever nonsense he lived on, to the teen. To which a startled Nastume answered entirely by reflex with a powerful punch to the stomach that sent the Guardien almost litteraly flying.

Yeap. Definitly should do that more often, was her last coherent thought before she dissolved into hilarity, as the comical way the surprised youkai had rolled on the floor a few feet away kept on replaying itself in her mind.

What she wouldn't have given for one of those human devices to capture this glorious moment _forever_.

.

.

One small part of himself was stuck wondering if this was setting a new record of sorts. Because honestly, starting a diplomatic incident with one of the local figures of autority in a less than ten minutes-long discussion was kinda short, even for his standarts. And he _lived_ with Nyanko-sensei, who had to be the less tactful being on the _planet_.

Whereas the rest of him was having a minor panic crisis, who could basically be resumed by ' _ohmygod whatdidIdo_!', silently praying for someone to just put an end to his misery already.

"I'm so sorry!" Natsume gasped, mortified, as he rushed towards the lying form of the youkai he had accidently hit. Yes, accidently. Which had to be the worst speech defense argument _ever_. "I swear I didn't mean to, just, reflex?"

Sadly, it was the complete truth. Years at running and fighting for his life had instiled in Reiko's grandson some strong instincts, which had led him to react without thinking when a basically unknown youkai had rushed towards him, hostile intentions or not.

Nyanko-sensei proved himself to be entirely unhelpful in front of this drastic situation, cackling maldy in the background with sporatic shouts of "That idiot!", which Natsume supposed were adressed at himself. Hana was equally incapacited as she held herself against a tree, wiping tears of hilarity every five seconds and laughing twice as hard each time she crossed his eyes.

Natsume held his hand towards the half seated male youkai, and silently cheered when the other took it without requiring more prompting on his part.

"Ryohei-san, I'm so confused," confessed the teen with what he hoped was a convincing apologectic voice, while he help up the white-haired athlete. "I..."

"Nastume," Ryohei interrupted him, his face dead serious as he grasped the surprised human's hand into his own. Nastume suddently felt very, _very_ afraid.

"Please join my fight club!"

There. This moment. This was the moment Natsume decided not try to search for good sense anymore.

.

.

"I must humbly refuse."

"But you're such a skilled opponent! The meanest EXTREME right hook I ever saw! You _have_ to!"

"Thanks but no."

"But!"

"No. Just...no."

Nastume didn't think he had ever felt more grateful than when Hana had finally taken upon herself to get her 'special snowflake' of a friend out of his back, fermly holding Ryohei's arm as she waved at them with wicked delight in the sunset.

"Not a word, Sensei. Not a word."

"Or what? You're gonna _hit_ me with your _mean EXTREME right hook_?"

"That's it. I'm revoking your Manju Rights."

"What? You _can't_! Manju is _sacred_!"

"Just watch me Sensei."

* * *

Manju is that kind of cake Nyanko loves

To the Guest who adressed my grammatical mistakes : thanks for the tip, as I said, English is not my first langage, and we have different grammatical rules, so yeah...Anyway, I heard your call!

I love Hana. If you love Hana too, please leave a review. If you don't, well, you can still leave a review! What? Who's begging? Not me

By the way, can anyone venture a guess on the nature of the God's Curse?


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